Do Guys Struggle with Body Image?
For so much of my life, I’ve been faced with pressure as a man to look a certain way. As an athlete especially, I had to be muscular: six pack abs, big biceps, ability to squat and bench a lot of weight. The goal was for my body to fit this mold of what others thought was the perfect body. This pressure for men to look like the celebrity on the latest Men’s Health magazine can severely impact our quest to be truly masculine.
To all of you out there, body image isn’t just a woman’s issue.
Men, if we were truly honest with ourselves, I think a lot of us would admit just how much we, too, obsess about our bodies. For a lot of us, body image is a driving factor in our lives. For me, it went beyond motivation– it’s what has defined me as a man.
As far back as middle school, I experienced constant pressure to look a certain way, to be skinny, to be ripped. Then came an obsession with how much I was working out, the food that I was eating, and even how I looked in the clothes that I wore. All of this because I wanted to be seen. We men want to be seen. We want to be enough. We do want to be wanted. And our being truly masculine is wrapped up in how we go about fulfilling those desires.
The truth is, our worth isn’t based on how muscular we are. Your strength doesn’t come from how much you can bench press. Your being enough should not and cannot be equated with how desirable of a body you do or don’t have. Rather, you have worth and dignity being who you already are. You are strong. You have ability to demonstrate such courage and boldness as a man. Men, you have a great capacity to lead and for others to follow suit by your willingness to be vulnerable. Our bodies aren’t meant to be obsessed over– they’re meant to lead us towards making a gift of ourselves.
Quick note on working out: it is so good to discipline and strengthen your body by means of working out. That said, working out can’t simply be used as the means to the end of looking good. Being healthy and physically fit can prepare you to love, if “your aim is love,” as St. Paul said.
Men, if we can approach working out as a way to be strengthened in virtue and love, rather than for the sake of looking good, we will be able to truly make a gift of ourselves to others.
