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Identity & Sexuality

March 15th, 2019
By Lauren Roach read
Posted in Culture

Who am I?

Even though our culture places a huge emphasis on sexual identity and attraction, the reality is that sexuality and attraction are a part of identity, but not the basis. Certainly, my identity is inseparable from my sexuality, because it is a significant aspect of my humanity and most definitely influences my experience of this world. But at the same time, my identity is not based solely on my sexuality because my sexuality is a part – an important part, but just a part – of the whole me. What is the whole, the basis for my identity? My personhood. My human dignity.

I am first and foremost a human person, created with infinite worth, created for fierce love. And I am a woman. My womanhood and femininity totally shapes who I am. I am a daughter, a sister, a friend. One day I hope to be a wife and a mother. I am an athlete, an aspiring writer, a sports fanatic, a lover of coffee and the color blue. These things, loves, and desires help make me who I am. But I would not say I am just a sister, just a sports-lover, just a woman attracted to men. I am so much more than these individual things. I am a human person capable of loving in this world like no one else, and you are too.

When it comes to love, it is tempting to equate love with romance, like our culture so often does. But love is about choosing what is inherently good for yourself and others. You are made for so much more than the thrill of a one-night stand or a relationship grounded in mutual use. You were made for more than just scrolling and reducing your identity to your attractions or relationship status. You are a human person made for love and relationship. And this love is about joy and mercy and compassion and delight and forgiveness.

Since our culture is so saturated with sex, sometimes we forget what our identity is all about. We forget that we are made for more than just the physical. We forget that our identity is so much more than our attractions. We forget what it means to be a human person. But what if we remembered? What if we reminded others of their worth and loved as we ought? What if we lived like we were made to- fiercely owning our identity and dignity and loving like no one else can?

What if?

About the Author


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