Does Clothing Matter?

“When you said you looked a mess, I whispered underneath my breath; you heard it. You look perfect tonight.”  “Don’t even bother asking if you look okay. You know I’ll say… cause baby you’re beautiful just the way you are.”

Maybe you’re a girl who loves fashion. Even if it’s just to check the mail, you won’t leave the house without makeup. You love it when heads turn, and shopping, sales and shoes is your love language! Or maybe you’re on the other end of the spectrum: dressing up is your worst nightmare, and you prefer being a low-maintenance kinda girl. Nothing really matters except comfort, so sweats, jeans, and sneakers are how you feel most like yourself. No matter where on the fashion spectrum you lie, one thing is certain: we are made to be loved for more than just shallow reasons like how we look. 

Sometimes girls pretend to not care about beauty because they’ve spent so long feeling anything but beautiful. And for others it becomes a painstaking thing. So many layers of lipstick applied in the car, the plucking and tweezing, the mirror selfies sent to friends to make sure outfits look okay, and all the insecurities about acne show our effort to earn affirmation. How we perceive our beauty can make or break a lot of our self-confidence and ability to receive love, especially from guys. It’s why girls love songs like Ed Sheeran’s “Perfect” and Bruno Mars’ “Just the Way You Are”. 

So the question comes up… Do clothes matter?

Clothes definitely shouldn’t be the only reason why someone loves us! Of course! And we probably owe it to ourselves not to stress out about clothes so much that we try to earn the love we need through what we’re wearing. BUT… clothing is still a big form of self-expression, and the ways we express ourselves can sometimes reveal a lot about us!

Here’s a few points:

1. Feeling beautiful is NOT shallow; vanity is. Feeling beautiful is good; in fact, as a woman, beauty is part of your very essence. Let me give you full permission and freedom to want this and relish in it. The trouble is with vanity. Vanity creeps in when our self-worth, our obsession, and pride comes from our appearance. If you find your self-esteem constantly dropping and rising based how you look, or if you fret in front of the mirror until it feels unhealthy, then maybe vanity is something we can work on! This can also happen when we feel like we cannot dress in more than just jeans and a T-shirt for fear of vanity. Remember that clothing by itself is just an object, it is not vain; but it’s all about the heart of who’s using it.
2. Clothing DOES matter when it comes to what we reveal. Modesty isn’t always fun to talk about, but it hurts when we wear something immodest and we get the wrong kind of attention that we don’t deserve. We definitely don’t have to wear turtlenecks, long skirts, or frumpy clothes (whew). But we can still wear fun, cute, and flattering clothes that invite someone to look a little deeper than our body parts when trying to get to know us. 

Dressing confidently is a good thing! Express yourself, feel confident, but don’t worry. Clothing isn’t everything. You’re already awesome and there’s nothing you can wear that will make you more or less awesome. So no matter if you’re the girly girl or the more low-key type, your clothes can show a lot about who you are and the kind of love you know you deserve.